Author Archives: mogwoppet

Windows is Troubled

Windows knows there is an error. It isn’t sure quite what is wrong. It is sad and bewildered.

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Remorse For Someone’s Part in Borders’ Closure

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Cute Sugar Packets from Puccino’s

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Viola Players Can Hold a Shoulder Rest in Place Telekinetically

Only violin players need actual plastic brackets. We viola players can just use the power of our minds.

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Knock-off Toy Company Milking Bratz-Dolls-Are-Setting-Bad-Example Controversy

Spotted in that Goldmine of Absolute Tat, a suburban Post Office.

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£1 Umbrella Bought in Harrogate During a Rain Storm

RAINDEAR IMPORTANT.

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In a Budget Italian Supermarket c. 2002

It is way better than its nearest competitor, “A Bit Too Far Away From Your Hair”. So I bought it.

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When GM Crops Mutate, Like, Really Badly

Actually, this may beat the Swearing Dog Toy Fury one. In other news, an out-of-control shrubbery has been given an ASBO. Photo by Rachel Smith

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Mwah ha ha ha ha

This was on the wall in a poncey corporate hotel I played a gig in once. I almost pressed it, because we had to ask three times for them to bring our drinks order, and when they finally did, the … Continue reading

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You Are Not Allowed To Be Here

We can’t be bothered to enforce this, but you’re not allowed to sue us if you fall in a hole here.

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